Love won today

            The Supreme Court has made a huge decision today by ruling DOMA unconstitutional. The decision is now in the states hands.

This is my opinion and I am sorry if it offends either side.

            Should same sex couples be allowed to marry? Ummm… in my opinion yes. Should the American government recognize a same sex union just the same as it does a heterosexual couple? Yes. Any benefit given by the government: tax benefit, inheritance benefit, insurance benefit, and just overall recognition of the love between human beings should be the same. 

            Let’s look at some benefits:

1.     Tax Benefits- What right does the government have to say a same sex couple does not deserve the tax benefits of filing a joint income tax? Sex has no barring. Two incomes are two incomes whether it is a man and woman or two woman or two men. The same goes for forming a family partnership and dividing business income among family members.

2.     Estate planning – here are a lot of benefits to being married whether it is inheriting a spouse’s estate, creating life estate trusts, or receiving priority in making financial and medical decisions.

3.     Government benefits such as social security, medicare and disability. What does the sex of the couple matter at all for any of these benefits?

4.     Employment benefits like sharing insurance, receiving retirement benefits from 401k or pensions, or receiving sick leave to care for a spouse or bereavement leave.

5.     Medical benefits like visiting a spouse in the hospital in intensive care or during restricted hours and also being able to make decisions if the other is incapacitated.

What about a couple’s gender makes them more or less deserving of these rights? I mean in a day when we are foolish if we don’t think heterosexual couples will get a marriage license not out of love but for the tax breaks. What about same sex couples that really love each other and want to be committed to each other… why are they less deserving?

What about the benefits beyond just financial? It’s peace of mind. It’s a sign that you find strength in the other person. You are committed to the other person. You want to live with and grow with that person. That is why most people get married. They want a partnership and I don’t see any difference in the commitment of same sex couples as their heterosexual counterparts.

I don’t see any reason why the federal government shouldn’t recognize their commitment. I don’t think the government has a right to say a same sex couple and their love for each other isn’t real or deserving of the right of marriage. Just the same as it didn’t have the right to tell women or African Americans they couldn’t vote. Love is love pure and simple. In time I hope people will realize that fact. 

            As I see it separation of Church and State works both ways. I don’t want the government telling me what religion or religious practice I can follow. I also don’t think my religion can tell other people how they should behave. I don’t live in a theocracy and I don’t want to…  I think any couple no matter the sex of the couple should be able to apply for a marriage license and be given one. I know same sex couples and their love for each other is no less real then any other couple. It deserves to be recognized and they deserve the same rights as any other couple.

            I will say this though. The government, whatever their decision is, won’t have the right to force a religious institution to perform a marriage that goes against their teachings. And that is separation of Church and State. 

            And to those who are going to tell me I am a bad Catholic for saying that I answer with the words of Miranda Lambert:

            I heard Jesus He drank wine

            And I bet we’d get along just fine

            He could calm a storm and heal the blind

            And I bet He’d understand a heart like mine.

Now this blog is called my Next 30 Years... I look forward to the advances in equality I will see in those years.

Filling a Pod!

In order to move a lot of stuff at one time we ordered a pod from Packrat. It was 16x7x8 and the company provided us with 15 moving blankets and a lock. The pod was dropped off on Saturday and will be picked up Tuesday with delivery at my house in TN in two weeks. So the plan was to fill it on Saturday with the packed boxes that were taking over our house. Then on Sunday morning get more stuff out of the attic (mostly Christmas decorations) to finish it off. Now one thing to keep in mind was the 6000lbs weight limit. It sounds like a lot but it was kind of surprising at how fast the pounds added up . . . in fact I don't know what thought was more daunting ..  the fact that we might hit the weight limit or the fact that we were moving that much stuff in two days.

We had a morning drop off time which meant between 8-1. Naturally the pod came at 1. Ok. So the plan was to fill the pod with as many like sized boxes as possible to prevent shifting while it was being transferred. The driver who dropped off the pod recommended keeping the heaviest stuff in the middle of the pod (rather then filling the back) this way the weight would be evenly balanced. So we started in the back left corner and moved left to right-front to back. 

We filled the back third with more fragile/lighter things. This also made more valuable stuff kind of protected since there is a whole lot of things to move to get to them. My Russian Nesting dolls and coin collection are back there. So are some keepsakes from high school trips and three months of living in Rome, Italy during college.  We also put all our vhs and dvds in the back. Once the back third was filled we used cardboard and an old mattress to secure it and bungee corded it tightly. Now we were at the middle where we were told to focus the weight. Since the mattress was on the left side of the pod I put the fridge on the right side. This way it will help to hold the items in the back still. It is bubble wrapped and we put the moving blankets over it then wrapped it in card board and individually bungee corded it to the side of the pod. Next we started loading boxes of books into the pod. What I did was take like items (Meg's books or my Mom's books or my books) and shrink wrap three boxes together. It made it manageable for me to move it on a hand truck and added stability. I had done the same in the back with the boxes of vhs and dvd. While it may have added time to packing the pod it will save time when we unpack it and, like I said before, it adds stability to the boxes. Basically everything we did was to prevent shifting as much as possible. Each box of books was roughly 50lbs which made each stack 150lbs. This is how the weight added up very quickly. Believe it or not but you are looking at 2000lbs of books right there! I hear that book sales are slowing down . . .this means in a few years next to the Library of Congress we may have the largest book collection in the Western Hemisphere :-) On top of the books we stacked boxes of my Mom's records, an old doll house, Christmas decorations, and my Mom's Christmas tree. Then we repeated the card board and bungee cords for extra support.

Now we had less then a third of floor space left. And I think about 1000lbs left. We added a grill that my amazing coworkers gave to Meg and me, a telescope that we have had since we were kids, our baby bassinets which my mom has kept all this time, and the hand truck I will need when we get down to TN. Each of the front items are individually bungee corded to the walls of the pod to prevent moving and shifting. We will see how well our precautions worked in two weeks when we go down to TN to unpack the pod. 

Next step is on Tuesday when the packrat pod will be picked up and weighed. Anyone want to make a guess as to the weight? I'll just hope for under 6000lbs or else we will have to unload some items before the driver can take it.

The Perfect Fridge!

When I bought the house it had most of the appliances already. It was just missing a fridge, washer and dryer. When I went for a week in January I bought a washer and dryer.

Thanks to having a laundry room I wasn't concerned with cosmetics of the appliances just functionality. My plan was to be smart about this and budget myself. So I bought the washer and dryer and figured when I paid off the washer and dryer on my credit card I would be ready to buy the fridge. The fridge was going to be more expensive because I knew what I wanted: stainless steel, four door, and possibly a Samsung. Well my plans got sped up a bit. There was a damaged fridge that was perfect for my needs. It has a large dent on the side (luckily the side covered by cabinets in my kitchen), there is a dent in the freezer (a simple towel on the handle will not only be useful but will cover the dent), and the freezer handle was dented (a call to the manufacturer could get a replacement piece). I made an offer taking into account the damage and it was accepted!

So now I have all the appliances I need. It is a Whirlpool. It has the french door for the fridge and the bottom draw freezer. Also it has the fourth door with a shelf for grabbing common items like cold cuts and soda. This way you don't open the entire fridge letting out all the cold air.

Luckily I was renting a pod (which is being dropped off next weekend) which will be perfect to move the fridge. To prevent further damage I have wrapped it up completely in bubble wrap and then it will also have moving blankets on it in the pod.

And now it is ready to go!

Kevin Bacon

I was in love with Kevin Bacon after seeing Footloose. . . . wasn't everybody?

I looked up all his movies so I would recognize them and watch them. I was shocked by the amount of movies he had been in. Slowly and surely I checked off Kevin Bacon movies on my must watch list here are some of my favorites:

Tremors

Flatliners

A Few Good Men 

The River Wild

Apollo 13 

Sleepers

Murder in The First

Then I heard about the six degrees of Kevin Bacon. Really? Any actor could be connected to Kevin Bacon in six or less moves. I laughed and accepted the challenge. Then I accepted the rule. I tried to come up with obscure actors that could never be connected to Bacon but still the rule never failed. 

It's easy to see how this happens. Kevin Bacon is in Wild Things with Matt Dillon . . . now think of all Dillon's movies and the cast he has been with: The Outsiders, There's Something About Mary, Crash and so on.

Or what about the fact that Kevin Bacon is in the River Wild with Joseph Mazzello . . .a familiar name because he is the little boy in Jurassic Park. Which leads you to Jeff Goldblum connections connections connections . . . I mean who isn't in the Big Chill???

Let's try Kevin Bacon to Chris O'Donnel.

Kevin Bacon is in Wild Things with Matt Dillon --> Matt Dillon is in the Outsiders with Ralph Macchio ----> Ralph Macchio is in My Cousin Vinny with James Rebhorn ---> James Rebhorn is in Scent of A Woman with Chris O'Donnel. 

Kevin Bacon and Sean Patrick Flannery

That one is real quick because Kevin Bacon is in Wild River with Joseph Mazzello ---> Joseph Mazzello is in Jurassic Park with Jeff Goldblum ---> Jeff Goldblum was in Powder with Sean Patrick Flannery. 

Kevin Bacon and Tom Hardy

Kevin Bacon is in X-Men First Class with James MacAvoy ----> James MacAvoy is in Starter for 10 with Benedict Cumberbatch ----> Benedict Cumberbatch is in Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy with Tom Hardy!

I thought Joel Grey may be hard but Kevin Bacon is in Tremors with Fred Ward ----> Fred Ward is Remo Williams with Joel Grey.

Meg said try Hugh Dancy.

Kevin Bacon is in Sleepers with Ron Eldard------> Ron Eldard is in Black Hawk Down with Hugh Dancy.

This one impressed me Kevin Bacon to Bob Fosse!

Kevin Bacon is in Wild Things with Robert Wagner -------> Robert Wagner was in All the Fine Young Cannibals with Natalie Wood ----->Natalie Wood was in West Side Story with Russ Tamblyn ---------> Russ Tamblyn was in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers with Tommy Rall----> Tommy Rall was in Kiss Me Kate with Bob Fosse.

Thanks to Meg for the assist with Fosse!

I could go on all night!

Coin Collecting

Several years ago I worked at a Barnes and Noble cafe. We had some wonderful regular customers. One couple was Al and Eileen (two mochas extra hot). I don't remember how the conversation first came up but one day I started talking to Al about coins. There is something about a tiny piece of metal surviving for years and all the history it survived through that just catches my imagination. I had a few mercury dimes and wheat pennies. Well about a week later Al came in with a surprise for me. He had a tube that had in it several buffalo nickels and wheat pennies. And that was all I needed to start a collection which has grown beautifully. Some coins I have been given, some I have bought and most I have found. The best find was a liberty head nickel in a coin star machine. You see, the older coins often have a different makeup/weight and so the automatic machines reject them.

I can't say for certain which coin is my favorite. I can name my top four: The peace dollar, the mercury dime, the buffalo nickel and the flying eagle cent.

More about some of my favorite coins:

The Peace Dollar:

On one side you have the profile of Lady Liberty, the words In God We Trust, and the year minted. On the reverse is an Eagle sitting on a rock with a rising sun behind it, United States of America, E Pluribus Unum, One dollar, and the word Peace written on the rock. The way a coin is judged on quality is often the detail in the crown, hair and sun since these lines will be worn down quickly by a lot of handling and use. The Peace dollar was minted after WWI to replace the supply of silver dollars (Morgan dollars) that were melted and sold to England to support the war.


The Bicentennial Quarter:

There is something about the bicentennial quarter (1776-1976) that I love. I don't know what it is about the Revolutionary drummer on the reverse of the coin but it's uniqueness and honor of our founding catches my imagination.

The State Quarters:

The open books hold two complete sets (minus the Denver minted Alaska and Hawaii coins). The third is now only missing a Hawaii quarter- either mint. Speaking of state quarters how about this pair

My soon to be old home state and my soon to be new home state. I like looking at the individual designs given to each state. I do feel a little bad for the NH quarter which features the Man on The Mountain, which sadly since the coin was minted has slid off the mountain.

The Mercury Dime and Buffalo Nickel:

The larger versions in this picture of the coins are silver pieces commemorating the actual coins. The smaller versions are the real size coins. In a coin store near me I saw miniature versions of these two coins (about the size of a small button) I asked the salesman how much for the minis and he told me they weren't for sale. Personally I was a little annoyed and felt it shouldn't be in the show case if it was not for sale. But had he sold them to me they would have looked great with the large versions. The mercury dime was my first favorite coin. The image of winged liberty was at first mistaken for the Roman God Mercury and the name stuck with the coin. Apparently the coin faced a number of issues when first minted because pay phones (remember those) and vending machines had trouble with them.
The Buffalo nickel shows a Native American on one side and a North American Bison on the other. It was minted from 1913-1938, the minimum a coin can be minted due to an 1890 act of congress. It had a lot of die and cast problems and so no one objected to replacing it with the Jefferson nickel. They are easy to find in coin stores and should be pretty cheap because on many coins the date was easily worn down to the point where many existing coins have no date. Also the hill that the buffalo stands on gets worn easily. For a slight historical note during the depression hobo's (actual engravers also jumped into the game) would take the buffalo nickels and carve designs into them. I have seen one picture where the Indian head has been turned into Santa Claus. The large head and buffalo made this the coin of choice because there was a lot of space to work with. I don't own any of these coins yet but I keep looking. Here are a couple of good examples I found:

The Flying Eagle Cent:

The 1857 coin in the white coin protector was a birthday gift from my sister. This coin was only minted from 1856-1858, it was before the congressional act that required a coin to be minted for a 25 year minimum. These coins were originally minted to not only replace large cent pieces that were becoming to costly to mint but also to replace Spanish colonial coins still being circulated in the US. Other than the fact that I find the eagle in flight stunning my biggest draw to the coin is the history that these tiny pieces of metal have witnessed. I mean when these coins were minted Oregon had just become the 33rd state and Abraham Lincoln had just become president. These coins were minted before the telephone and light bulb were invented and 50 years before the Ford Model T first appeared on the market. Since the minting of these coins America had a civil war,  three presidents have been assassinated, we have had a woman's right movement and a civil rights movement, two world wars, and a great depression.

I don't know what the face value would be of the coins in my collection. I know if I took in to consideration the rise in value and collection value that amount would go up considerably. However, the historical value like I listed with the flying eagle cent is why I collect. The beauty of the designs, the stories they tell, and the events they have survived have a value in and of themselves.

Now as I move south I will continue my collection and maybe some day add some of the rarest coins: confederate coins.

Baseball Caps

The baseball cap isn't just for baseball anymore!

I was packing some stuff up and I came across some of my old baseball caps.

The Yankee cap is my first Yankee cap. We went to several games one year, thanks to $8 bleacher seats. The bleacher entrance was, in my opinion, the best entrance into the Old Yankee Stadium and perhaps, the best entrance into any ball park. In order to get to the field from the bleachers you had to walk up a ramp. So as you turned out of the dark tunnel under the stadium first you were hit with the smell of the freshly cut grass and the sight of a bright blue sky. Then as you walked up the ramp the stadium slowly opened up to you until finally there you were looking from center field to home plate.

 I saw a lot of good games with this hat. In particular one beautiful July afternoon. July 18th to be exact. The Yankees were playing the Expos and on the mound was my favorite pitcher, David Cone. David Cone was in control from the very beginning and early on the crowd knew something special was happening.  I think it was in the third inning when my Mom turned to us and said he is throwing a perfect game. There were a couple of heart stopping moments. Paul O'Neil made a spectacular catch and Chuck Knoblauch overcame his throwing woes for a day to make perhaps his best throw as a Yankee. The last out was a pop up to Scott Brosius at third base then David Cone put his hands up and dropped to his knees. It is a moment I will never forget.


The Mighty Ducks hat is my first hockey love. I watched that movie over and over.

The Joe's hat is a piece of Highlander memorabilia. Thanks to amazing parents I have the entire tv series on vhs. It was definitely my favorite tv show as a kid. We also had a replica Duncan MacLeod katana sword. One day when I was home alone I heard a noise from my parents bed room. I took the sword and my dog on a leash and walked through the house. Obviously no one was in the house.

In the back is a hat from the FBI. I spent half a summer working as a summer hire for the Manhattan office. It was amazing to be an FBI employee. I worked in closed files and escorted people around the building who didn't have clearance.

The green hat is from the Viking Star Ship out of Montauk, NY. We went whale watching when we were younger and I got the hat. I have to go back this summer before I move (we have a list of must dos).  Not only did I see a whale but we also had dolphins play behind the boat. Oh yeah and a sun fish who has a fin like a shark which can be unnerving to a child with a good imagination :-)


The last hat is from the zoo in Asheboro, NC. When I was younger my Dad worked in North Carolina for a year. We went to visit one week and discovered perhaps the most amazing zoo ever! They were still constructing it but one part that had been finished was the African plains. It actually made you feel like you were really there on the plains. It had beautiful wide open areas where animals could be seen roaming. By now it is finished and I think it will be well worth the drive one weekend to go back and see the finished zoo. Not only does the hat bring back good memories but it is perfect. It sits perfectly just above my ears and the material is soft and light so it doesn't get to hot.